Silence Can Be Deadly - Ignoring The Signs and Hiding The Pain
Ignoring The Signs – Hiding The Pain
Silence can be deadly in so many ways. It is not just a physical death that I am talking about, it is death of the soul/spirit!
The very essence of the title of my memoir “The Unspoken Truth” – think about those words, let them resonate into your mind. What does it really mean? That term “unspoken” the eerie silence that sits heavy on the mind a past untold for all of time. SILENCE!!!!!!
When you have been through deep struggles, trauma, abuse or pain and you do not express what your feeling; this can cause tremendous damage as you try to move forward with your life.
In the moment, you decide to bury it, hide it, forget about it in hopes that it will go away, never to rear its ugly head again. A pain so deep and dark that the words refuse to flow from your lips as your ears cannot handle the truth of all that has happened! You run, You Hide, but you cannot escape it, because in the corners of your mind it festers and grows. When you least expect it, it creeps out to seek the light of day to wreak havoc on your daily life. You repress it, push it back down deeper determined to win this battle of the wills. You will NOT be victorious in the silence, only tears of defeat will wash over you time and time again like the tides going in and out with no end. What a horrible existence so many people living in this darkness. I lived in this darkness too, refusing to peek back into my hideous past because it was too horrific to view.
What made me decide to take the painful journey towards healing. I was done letting this darkness control my life. I was done with the silence! Something inside of me was screaming it was time for the world to know what happened to that little girl!!! I dug deep, and with every ounce of my being I finally let the words flow from my lips. It hurt!!! Plain and Simple!!! To hear those words out loud was terrifying, heart-breaking but REAL. I STAND – I BROKE THE SILENCE ONCE AND FOR ALL. I CRIED A MILLION TEARS…. Then I did the UNTHINKABLE – I shared! I told my therapist, my husband, my family and friends. This was a huge weight off of my mind, body and spirit. The more I shared the stronger I became. I felt validated for the first time in my life! WOW, what a powerful moment of healing. YES healing!!!
Now I have gained my voice. I am loud, strong and confident. The healing process has begun. It took me years (YES YEARS) to speak those words, but what a haunting melody it was. I was free, finally free of the chains that bounded me to the cobwebs of my mind. NO more silence. The past does not win, my abuser does not win, what life has bestowed upon me does not win. I Win!!
Has it been an easy journey to healing. NO! It was harder than living the actual abuse. I had to look back, relive, feel and face all the ugly truths one by one; but I did it. I slayed the beast! I claimed my spot as a LIFE WARRIOR, and you can too. I believe in each and every one of you! All you have to do is stand. It starts with the words…. “I have a story to tell are you willing to listen to me” - The answer is YES.
Embrace The Journey