One Moment Can Change A Whole Life Path. The Unspoken Truth A Memoir - The Prologue
Palm Beach International Airport early in the afternoon I am boarding a plane to go back home. As I stand there in line I look around at my surroundings people are coming and going. The hustle and bustle of this busy world we live in encompasses me like a bubble of loud confusion. At the moment I feel so small, so insignificant to all around me. My eyes are glassy, and my face is pale and sullen. One small tear drips from my eye as I stand there waiting.
Ticket please, I hear echoing from so far away. I am instantly snapped back into reality. Yes, here is my ticket, I say with a stutter. The attendant looks at me eyeing me intently, and says, Are you all right Miss? I say Yes I am, and I quickly board the plane.
As I take my seat I am oblivious to everything around me. I sit by the window as always, and my mind begins to wander. I am thinking, I have traveled home like these countless times before. I would always be so excited to see my family and thought about how much I missed them while I was gone. I also thought about what was going on with them during my absence, and how did they all survive without me? My family was vibrant and full of energy, so I could only imagine the stories that will be told when I finally arrive home. The best part of my home-coming would always be, getting off the plane and seeing my handsome husband standing there waiting for me with his brilliant smile and warm brown eyes. I looked forward to that moment every time, when we embraced, and he would hug me and tell me he loved me. He always made me feel safe and complete.
Coming home this time was quite different. This time with a heavy heart, I had to say good-bye to my father, this strong, powerful presence of a man. My dad, my phone buddy, as I called him. He was just a phone call away in times of joy or sorrow, or just to say hey what is going on at your end of the world. My dad passed away after a long hard battle with heart disease and diabetes. He was only 69 and had so much more he wanted to do in this life. I sat with him as he passed, talking to him telling him how much I loved him and to look for my brother. Dad, “When you see Jon Jon, go be at peace, no more pain, no more sorrow”. At that moment, he opened his eyes looked up into the corner of the room and I knew right there and then my brother had arrived to take him home. I could feel his presence so warm and powerful “Candle in the Wind” was playing on the radio at the moment of his death followed by “Lean on Me”, and just like that, he was gone.
Cloudy out today isn’t it? I hope we do not get turbulence. Once again, I am shaken back into reality. I look over at this little old woman sitting next to me so small and frail wearing a pink sweater. I try to smile and say, “Yes, it is cloudy for sure, but we will be fine no worries”, and I touched her hand to give her reassurance. Even in my time of great sorrow, I still felt the need to give compassion to others. It is in my nature to do so; I was blessed with this gift. It felt like my dad put this woman next to me to show me that life does go on, and there is still so much more work to do.
I then turn away and pick up the ring now hanging on my necklace that once draped over my father’s ring finger. With tear filled eyes, I pull the ring close to my lips. My hands are shaking as I rub his ring over my lips giving it a kiss. I then close my eyes and begin to think back to a time when I was a child. The moment in my life that changed everything.
That plane ride home seemed endless. So many memories swirling through my mind. My father's passing brought me back to the very moment of my brother's death so many years ago when I was a young child.
This image of me sitting in the chair at my grandparents house. I am six years old, and my parents just came through the door My dad dropped to his knees put his head in my lap and muttered the words, "Your brother is gone, what will we do without him?" as he sobbed uncontrollably. I was in shock and the loud cries of my family scared me, but as frightened as I was I took my little hand and stroked my fathers hair and whispered the words, "Its OK daddy you still have ME."
The death of my brother John Patrick Sega changed the lives of many people that day, but nobody could of ever predicted the journey my parents and I would ultimately travel.
A moment in time can change absolutely everything!
I share this today on the eighth anniversary of my father's passing. April 27, 2010 at 11:29 am my father joined my brother taking his final walk into the gates of heaven, hand in hand with my brother two souls united once again. On January 28, 2014 my mother would join them.
I miss my family every single day, but they always manage to send me the most incredible signs, and I know they are with me.